I come here every time there is a overflow of thoughts in my mind. whatever i write doesn’t make any sense to readers but these are just the feelings of my mind and heart which i want to put on this 800 * 300 px text area.
Sometime life becomes so annoying to us. There could be thousands of reason behind that. It could be family problems, personal problems, betrayal, low social connectivity or something you might be already going through. When all of them come together you just start hating everything, that my perception. When all of such things come together there will be a change, change in the way you live your life, your thinking, your mindset, your priorities. Everything just change.
When i recollect some of my old memories i was a very positive towards my life, my decision, my relations, my thinking. But now when i see my self what all i have is negativity all around. All decision gone wrong, whatever i planned its going just the opposite way. Situations turned in way never thought of.
I am just passing everyday. similarly a week and a month and so on. Means even after these hard tries what has gone wrong that situation never comes under control. The imbalance of financial state was not enough that faced same for relationship. The more i try to come out of these situations the more i slid into it. Its been 1 year 3 months and 10 days i am in Dubai and i should not blame the organization as they are paying enough then why my family is still under financial crisis.
People may have dream to go abroad and settle down but it wasn’t same with me. I never wanted to leave my country, my family and my friends. Still i came in the hope of helping my own family, but what i have ended up with more loans and more credit card bills.
Sometime i just think when i was young and staying at home, we use to sleep on daawan ki charpai under the open sky where you can see the stars all night. During that time dreamed of to get good quality beds and bedrooms with AC’s. Today when i have acquired those dreams i just miss those young golden days of sleeping under the open sky and wish to go back one day permanently. Again a dream but other way around.
In short i just miss my family big time. Would love to share one song below.